The Next Chapter

Are you the last woman?

I’m about to take August off.

I’m not going anywhere (except a tiny trip to Iceland); this month is purely for my own enjoyment. Last year, it was a dopamine sabbatical - no emails, socials, notifications incoming or sharing with the world. There was no white-knuckling, I sank into it with joy. I returned re-invigorated, renewed and refreshed with bold new ideas.

This year, I choose differently.

This year I’m sinking into my art and letting everything else fade away for a month.

Painting, yes of course. But also building the systems that will support my artistic life. Both are at the top of my ‘light me up list’ and it shall be a month of pure self-indulgence. In service of my artistic life, I also want to take care of my body as well as my soul so I am strong and full of energy for my return in September.

It takes preparation and work to do this: informing clients I won’t be available, setting up systems to provide support while I’m away, getting clever with my business model, changing how my phone works.

The desire for freedom drives everything I do.

The freedom to do whatever I want whenever I want.

It started when my children were born. I left my stable position as a manager at PricewaterhouseCoopers in London and started a job at the NHS so I could cut the travel time and be closer to home. “Still more,” said my soul, so I set up my own business and my hours have been mine from that day forward.

Aged 32, that was what freedom looked like for me.

Aged 42, it looked like travelling the world, going somewhere new every month to learn from the best mentors I could find.

Aged 54, it looks like having my days be filled with whatever pleasures me in that moment. And solitude when I need it. And a month free every year to super-charge that.

Do I ever have to do shit I don’t want to? To be honest, very rarely. I have to clean up the dog poo. I have to brush my hair when it’s wet. Sometimes I have to get up at 4.30am to pick one of my kids up from watching a football match (and even that was my choice). Somehow, one small decision after another, my life has become filled with that which I love. And everything else gets taken care of.

There have been bad weeks/months/years where I have had to do things which break my heart and I would not wish another person to ever have to do. But I have been able to be there, as my choice.

I am very aware of the privileged life I was born into as part of my white middle-class family that has allowed me to do this. And lucky that I LOVE my work as I am the breadwinner for my family of five.

Here’s what I want the next chapter of my life to be filled with: continued freedom (so a business that can run without me when I want it to), lightness, deep connection and beauty.

In September, well rested and with my cup full, I will be asking six other women: what do YOU want for your next chapter?

Do you know the feeling of it, even if you don’t yet know the form? What seeds shall we plant now to create a life that reflects the women we are now, at this age; seeds that will grow and flourish over our next decade? What does this look like for YOU, as opposed to any other woman?

The soil is rich and fertile at midlife, fortified with lived experience and a wisdom that only comes from passing through the fires of menopause.

“So now what?” I shall be asking them.

The rules of the game have changed. We are different. What we want is different. What will the flavour of this next chapter be? How do we want to be used in service to the world? Or simply in service to ourselves.

And then, in our small group, side-by-side, we will travel together and create for six months. We will have each others’ backs, we will cheer each other on, encourage each other when we hit the hard times. We will know each other’s souls inside out by the end.

This sabbatical is my preparation for that.

So, this being my last Substack to you before I go, I wanted to let you know there is one place remaining.

If that sense of starting something new appeals. Or that sense of moving into a new chapter and wanting company while you do it. A sense of belonging. Or exploring how to align with both your human design and your current desires for your next chapter. Or creating a life where you can take a month off every summer (!). If so, check out The Next Chapter and then email me. I’ll find a time for us to talk before I start my sabbatical at the end of Friday.

Aside from that - have a wonderful summer and here’s me signing off until September.

Nic x

“When I have been stuck, cocooned in this life, it was women who came to free me.
Women who reminded me what I am made of and who I am becoming.
Women, who broke my shell, reached for my hands and pulled me out.
Not just to fly again, but to fly higher than ever before.
There is much beauty, much ancient history, in that intuitive network of strength, support and silent sisterhood.
Treasure it, as you would a very special gift, because that's what it is, my sisters, that is what it is.”

Sisterhood - Donna Ashworth