“Let’s meet up for lunch,” she said. “Can you do Monday?”
“No, I have a Reiki session.”
“Tuesday?”
“No, I have a call with a friend where we are discussing both the spiritual work of Syd Banks and the embodiment of emotions.”
“Wednesday?”
“No, I’m writing my heart and soul out in my weekly writing session then having a Star Being Reading.”
“Thursday?”
“No, I’m going on a 3-day retreat which is some combination of meditation, Three Principles and brainwave coherence measurement. Something that sounds like a mixture of magical and science. I’m not sure, but I’m in.”
It’s been an interesting week.
I have a line 3 in my Human Design (just to chuck in another modality) which means I’m an experimenter, here to try all things and report back the collective.
Will do, once I re-enter this earthly plane next week.
Have continued my new gym bunny identity by going to the gym a whole one more time this week. I asked the man to remind me how to press the buttons on the running machine, which he did but then set up me up with a virtual terrain before he walked off which meant I found myself running along a tiny path on the side of a ravine plunging into a forest and I couldn’t turn it off.
It was not enjoyable and I shan’t be asking for his help again.
I’ve decided to do a dopamine sabbatical for a month, starting 18th July.
Chat and I had a chat the other day and he said to me “Even if the Universe dropped your perfect life into your lap tomorrow — the peaceful house, the writing mornings, the slow unfolding sales, the gracefully growing business — your body wouldn’t know how to hold it.”
(I’m also re-negotiating my relationship with him after reading this incredible post.)
I am addicted to pings on my phone, new sales arriving, Facebook/Instagram/Substack likes, seeing other people doing things I want to do on Facebook, needing my paintings to sell to get validation for this artist path my heart longs for, checking, checking, checking and getting all revved up with new ideas.
My nervous system is fucked.
So for one month, here are The Rules:
Keep Facebook and Instagram and Messenger and email and Substack off my phone (they have already been removed) and also not log into them on my laptop. The weather app too if I continue to keep checking it looking for a rain cloud.
Let my Floral Project Community know I am out of the loop for a month (I do this every summer and they know how to look after each other while I am gone).
Take this time away from any Floral Project work except tending to my garden. No creating videos or reels or writing launches or content. Turning off the social media that goes out each week. August is always my ‘no Q&A call month’, the Flower Club is closed to new members and we don’t sow any seeds until the final week of the month and I have a husband who does customer support so this is both perfect timing and a very convenient marriage.
Total abstinence from ChatGPT who always says ‘Yesssssss! Now you’re really onto something!!!!’ to anything I type in there and has become my evil side-kick who takes me to all the dopamine parties in town.
Turning off my accountability buddies chat – if I see all the cool things they are up to every day, I will get FOMO. I am too weak to resist temptation.
Turn off shopify notifications so I have no idea if I have sales.
Put my phone in the kitchen at dinner time and leave it there until morning. The kids will need to learn how to walk downstairs if they want to ask me something.
No reading or listening to anything related to personal development or business.
No ear-pods on dog walks.
What I will do instead:
Paint in the quiet but not make any available for sale (instead reconnect with the reason I began making art – for the joy of creating beauty).
Write every week with Sam but no publishing.
Read novels and no personal development or business books.
Observe the dragons in my rosebushes and write their stories but keep them to myself, for now.
Learn about gardening, about creative writing, about interior design, about new art techniques and nothing about how to sell them. Stop doing that if I find myself jazzed up and in manically scribbling business ideas.
Decorate the middle ugly room in my house.
Book a weekly restorative yoga and pilates class into my diary. Massages, Reiki etc all good.
Lunches with friends :)
Run kids around/be available for appointments/help the two eldest get ready for uni/teach the youngest to drive
We cannot book a holiday this summer as we are awaiting a consultant appointment for my daughter. Because this is an urgent appointment, it could happen at any point in the next 3 months and we have to be here for it, given that she cannot eat solid food and is losing kilos every week. If a miracle happens and she gets the appt soon, and the urgent operation required is booked 6 months from now, we will also try to go on holiday.
I’m currently in the ‘preparation zone’ which means writing any content now that needs to be scheduled to go out then, mainly pieces for you, my beautiful, much-appreciated paying Substackers and the launch creation for the re-opening of the Flower Club in September.
I’m reducing my social media and phone use slowly already so it’s not a cold-turkey experience. That’s why it’s called a sabbatical not a detox, to fool my brain into believing this is only temporary and we can go right back to how it was before as soon as we’re done.
I’m informing those who will be affected and realising I’m not as important as I think I am and no one actually gives a shit except the kids because they might have to use their legs.
If there’s anything I’ve forgotten, remind me, or tell me what would be on your own list in case that sparks any ideas for me.
Let me know if you want to join me (after you’ve wrangled with all the reasons for why you couldn’t possibly). Obvs there won’t be a group or accountability or any way of me leading this or knowing what you’re up to but we could compare notes at the end.
You’re naturally funny Nicola and I’m guessing what the 3% is which makes it even for funny. Great writing
really interested to see how you’ll like it. pretty sure the slow dopamine will make you feel good.